JUST in case you were wondering this is kind of how the law works for some in this country.

Let me give you a rough guide. Guilty of something? Caught bang to rights? Okay I’m guilty even though it was just in the heat of the moment, is that how I should plead, solicitor? ‘Well, yeah really because if you don’t then by the time to trial comes around you could have been dealt with and free.’ Free?

You mean I’ll be on remand? But surely there’s a presumption of bail, why would I go to prison to await the trial?

I thought only dangerous murderers had that treatment. ‘Ah, but they want to make an example of you.

Plead guilty and that’ll go in your favour.’ Trial. Oy, solicitor, you said I’d be fine. ‘Well, no one really knows that for def. They did want to make an example of you, I did say this. See you in three years. Bye.’

But for some. Caught bang to rights. I’m pleading not guilty, okay – it was just something in the heat of the moment?

Presumption of bail. So I’ll be out and about until the trial, I presume ‘Yeah, course you will.’ I did this thing, but I have ADHD. Mental health blah blah and I’m peaceful and I didn’t mean it in the way you think I did. ‘Okay, I get that. Off you go scot free. Have a nice life.’ Nothing to see here about two-tier justice. Nothing to see here about using the laws perversely, laws which should be rock solid and immutable and a stanchion of our society. Absolutely nothing. Everyone now using mental health issues as a get out of jail card is a pretty low blow because it totally devalues the cases of those who really do have mental health issues.

It’s become a joke and that’s not good. It makes it even harder for some people to open up, especially men.

Women tend to find each other to talk to, but with men it’s harder. That’s why groups like Andy’s Man Club and Men in Sheds are invaluable because loneliness is a terrible thing to experience.

So it will be interesting to go and see the theatre show ‘Sunny Side’ which is coming to the Civic next month as the production is centred around the modern male experience of mental health struggles. Deffo worth a ticket, I reckon. Tickets on the Civic’s website.

Bad customer service has severely affected my mental health, let me tell you – and I’m not using the phrase lightly either because the stress has kept me awake and I wouldn’t have liked to have taken my blood pressure reading this week.

Oh how I miss the store Debenhams – it was a one-stop Christmas shop for me so I thought I’d be on safe ground using the online store.

I might have been had I not had to return anything. The faff I’ve had with trying to get my money back for returned goods from them.

No one to ring, just a ‘chat bot’ who can’t answer the questions you want answering. No one returning your emails. My partner’s had the same problem with Size?

A parcel that didn’t arrive because ‘no one was in’ (yes we were) and it was coming the next day. Didn’t. Then the next day, then the next – for two whole weeks. Then it was returned to them (why?). He emailed and just got ‘tips on what to do when your parcel hasn’t landed’. He left negative feedback and suddenly they get in contact wanting to talk about his response.

God help us if the High Street ever folds completely. Be warned.